Funk

Too whiny to post on facebook...

Goodness do I feel sick. That was an awesome 7 months of remission. All good things must come to an end though I suppose.

I'm feeling so out of whack, like something's not working in me. Well, aside from the obvious. I think I'm just stressed and overwhelmed with these symphony auditions, school starting back up ,and after this last semester with that one particular class, I'm not particularly fond of the idea of going back to the place where hell was a living experience 3 days a week. And things like... the fact that the house is a mess and it's beyond my control. Although after a talk with parents tonight, we have a plan for kicking these kids through the Priest Home Boot Camp for Chores... because it is making me sick. I think this mess is really what is making my head and emotions feel so...deprived, confusing and funky.

And it's been an emotionally weird day. Not all bad emotions either, no, actually a lot of them are excellent, but this funk I'm in is just bothersome.

I think deep down, I'm just extremely frustrated about being sick again. I've worked my butt off to be healthy, and I got there. Life has been soooooo good to me these last several months. Heck, I was just in the middle of enjoying life, nothing super stressful happening, just being me, and it hit again. I hate this pain. I hate feeling sick, I hate not being able to eat and then nearly passing out three times a day, I hate that I can't talk to anybody who truly understands exactly what it is that I go through. There's an online support group, but they're not here in person for me to cry with or anything. I'm just so frustrated that I am sick. Again.

GRR.